I am a week into the semester and behind on the readings for all the classes I have reading assignments for. Books are showing up in the mail, one by one. I do not have a place to put them in this house. They are in a pile that I move off the bed to sleep and onto the bed to get into the closet.
I have given notice at my full time job. There are not enough hours in the week to do all of this, and that’s the one thing I need to be getting done with. It makes me nervous – who wouldn’t be? But I keep telling myself it’s just money and right now my time is worth more to me than thirteen dollars an hour.
I have not got my community service site placement sorted out. This is making me more nervous, because there are deadlines and I suck at deadlines and if I can’t get this figured out how am I ever going to succeed at this or anything else and — hello, vortex of personal inadequacy, haven’t seen you in awhile, now go away.
I have to finish my career assessment package today and email that because it is due tomorrow and then they are supposed to send me more stuff to do and I don’t know when I’m going to have time for that because meetings and choir rehearsal and job and career assessment and —